Aftermaths of Aftershocks
by darthsquirt2
Summary: After visiting the new Terra for the last time, Beast Boy is left wondering why she would give up her old life completely, and turns to his team for answers and reassurance. Not all are eager to provide them, however,


We open to a pleasant, sunny, spring day in Jump city. The birds chirp, the bees buzz, the villains plot. Everything is normal. As normal as it ever gets in a city filled with super powered nut cases. In all truth, the serenity was slightly unsettling, considering that not long ago, the world had almost ended.

Out in the bay, overlooking the city, Titan tower was, unusually so, pretty calm. In the living room, Beast Boy was engaged in his usual struggle with Cyborg via the gamestation. Raven was meditating quietly in her room, while Robin and Starfire were out on a 'non' date, as Starfire had taken to calling them, much to Robin's chagrin.

As Cyborg again trampled over Beast Boy's avatar, he let out a low sigh, instead of engaging in his usual shouting contest. Cyborg, who was gyrating his hips in his customary victory dance, stopped cold.

"What's up?" He asked, his tone suddenly serious.

Beast Boy looked at him uncertainly, deciding wether or not to burden his robotic friend with his troubles. The need for comfort won out.

"Have you ever wished that things were...normal?" He asked cautiously.

"Normal?" Cyborg repeated, confused. "Normal how?"

"You know, a normal life, normal jobs, normal...abilities?" He elaborated, quietly.

'Terra' The name echoed through the mind of the team's resident sorceress, down for her noon mug of tea. Her hands tightened around the mug as her teeth ground together. 'Terra' The ex-Titan had betrayed them all, in return for the ability to master her unstable powers. She'd almost doomed the entire city to destruction. She'd redeemed herself however, by sacrificing herself to undo the plot. She'd died alone in the mouth of a volcano, trying to stem the flow. She'd died a hero. A hero to everyone, but Raven. To Raven, she was a reminder. A painful example of what could happen to her, if she ever lost control or took the easy path. Raven left the room quickly, her mug still empty.

"Well," Cyborg mused, flexing his robotic fingers, recalling the accident that led to his...condition. "Yeah, I've wondered about it sometimes. Who hasn't. But I wouldn't trade this," he gestured grandly around him. "for anything."

"He means he wouldn't trade his car for anything." Robin smirked as he walked into the room, fresh from the mall, and carrying several oddities in large packages. Starfire followed him in, burdened by easily three times as many parcels.

"Who would not trade his car, and for what?" She looked inquisitively at the two team members seated around the television.

"Nothing Starfire." Beast Boy replied quickly, spinning back to face the television.

Cyborg shot him a quizzical glance, but didn't push the issue. He knew when something was eating Beast Boy.

'I'll talk to Robin about it later.' They both decided.

"Hey Robin." Beast Boy waved in greeting, entering the team leader's room.

Robin smiled to himself, hitting he punching bag a few more times with increasingly complex strikes. The picture of Slade-his longtime foe-tapped to it, wasn't disturbing him much anymore. He turned to face his teammate.

"What do you need?" Robin asked pleasantly.

"I uh...was um," Beast Boy stammered, wringing his hands together.

"Yes?"

"Did you ever wish you were normal and not a hero?" Beast Boy sputtered, the words seemingly falling from his mouth.

That was enough to knock the smile from Robin's face. He tried to recall a memory, any pleasant memory from before his current career. But very few people can take happy memories from an orphanage. He was silent for several moments, deep in thought.

Beast Boy took the opportunity to ask himself why he came to Robin- the guy who lived and breathed crime fighting-with 'this.'

"No." Robin said with absolute certainty. "Never." He stared seriously at Beast Boy. "Do you?"

"No!" Beast Boy recoiled, as if the very idea was appalling.

"But you know someone who does?"

"I used to." Beast Boy sighed, turning to leave the room. "Not anymore."

Robin stepped down in to the common room not fifteen minutes later, and was surprised to see that Cyborg was alone on the couch, playing against someone from Norway. Robin sat beside him, observing the match.

"Do you know where Beast Boy is?" Robin asked him eventually.

"Nah." Cyborg replied, never taking his eyes from the screen. "Why? You looking for him?"

"Concerned," Robin corrected. "He's been acting odd recently."

"He ask you too?" Cyborg spared Robin a glance.

"Yeah."

"Do you think he asked Starfire?"

"No." Robin shook his head. "She comes from an entire planet of super powered people. I don't think she'd even understand the question."

They sat in silence for a while, both pretending. To concentrate on the game.

Finally, Cyborg sighed. "I think he went up to the roof." He told Robin, quietly. "Said he needed to think about something.

"Isn't Raven up there?" Robin muttered to himself.

"Been there all day." Cyborg smiled. Sometimes people forgot about how different he was. Enhanced hearing was just another 'gift.' It was a sigh of how comfortable the team was, that they could all treat each others as normal.

"That's what I was afraid of." Robin jumped up from the couch and headed towards the stairs.

"Take pictures!" Cyborg called after him.

"Azeroth, Metrinon, Zinthos." Raven intoned, weighing down the night with her words of power.

'Inner peace.' She thought solemnly, trying to focus herself, and her emotions. 'Inner tranquility.'

"Azeroth, Metrinon, Zinthos." She repeated, letting the familiar words wash over her, soothing in their repetitive nature.

"Azeroth, Metrinon, Zinthos." Just like the monks taught her. Collected, controlled, calm.

She rounded violently, fixing a deathly stare on a spot behind her, the source of great turmoil, and confusion. A fly peeled itself from the tiling. And hagan to make lazy circles around her.

"Beast Boy." She growled. He needed to learn by now, disguises never worked on an empath.

The insect let out a decidedly un-flylike "Eep!" and tried to flee.

She reached out, pinned the fly between a thumb and forefinger, and slammed it into the roof. When she removed her hand, it was not from a squashed bug, but a dazed teammate.

"What do you want?" She growled, sliding to the ground, her hours of meditation completely undone.

Beast Boy stared back up at her, terror evident on his face.

Sighing, Raved planted a firm hand on his shoulder and guided him to the edge of the roof. She sat him down, and settled in on the edge beside him.

"Now, what was so important?" She asked with some of her former neutrality.

"I...I had a question." He stuttered quietly.

"Well, you're here now. What is it?"

"Raven," He began in a low tone. Raven gave him her undivided attention, sensing the gravity of his inquiry. "Do you ever wonder what it would be like to be normal?" He looked up at her, hopefully. "Do you ever wish you weren't different?"

Raven stared at him for several minutes, at a loss for a response. One word reverberating around her otherwise empty thoughts. 'Terra'

"This is about her, isn't it?" Raven whispered.

Beast Boy fidgeted nervously. "What are you-"

"This is about Terra, isn't it?" Raven almost shouted. Beast Boy looked up at her, once more frightened. He tried to say something, but Raven cut him off, sensing the truth.

"She lived her life in complete isolation until she met us! Every day when she woke up, the first thing she would do, is stare at her bag and wonder when she'd have to leave us too. And she did."

Beast Boy wanted to leave, but leaving intact stopped being an option when Raven was like this.

"Her powers were chaotic, and she hurt people because she couldn't control them. Friends, family, pets, she drove them all away. Do you know how much she hated herself?"

He tried to move, but couldn't. It seemed, to him at least, like a nightmare. A terrible cutscenes with no skip option. A horror movie with no way to shield his eyes.

"And in the end, she managed to control them. What did that get her?" Raven stared at Beast Boy, red tinting her pupils. "The hatred of thousands and a painful death."

"Wha-" Was all he could manage in reply.

"Oh yes," Raven continued, mercilessly. "It was all good, and heroic, but you didn't live through it." Despite herself, tears began to well up in Raven's eyes. "You didn't feel every second of it, spas she was baked alive and turned into a statue." Beads of water began leaking down her face, leaving salty tears that seemed to burn her skin in their wake. "She was still alive at that point, even as the lava cooled." Raven whispered. "At least she bled to death before she had a chance to suffocate." She spat in a bitterly sarcastic tone.

She wiped the tears away, even as Beast Boy did the same

"You want to know if I ever wonder how things could be different?" She asked in a lower tone than before, that somehow carried far more weight. "My father was a demon. He used me to try and destroy this world. I can't feel anything without worrying wether or not I might loose control. Yes. I think about it every day."

She stood, and began the journey back to her room. "She's earned the peace." Raven stated with finality. "Let her go."

As she reached the door, she noticed Robin leaning against it. She mentally berated herself; her loss of emotional control let her empathic powers slip.

"What do you want Robin?" She asked him, exasperated.

"The lights have been going crazy for the past few minutes. Doors too." He stated, fairly offhandedly.

"Have Cyborg fix it." She brushed past him, continuing to the sanctuary of her room.

Robin walked with her, matching her brusque pace. They strode in silence, almost the entire way, the only sound heard was their own echoing footsteps.

"Did you mean any of that?" He finally asked, when they reached her room.

She clenched her fists in frustration, halfway through the doorway. She'd been so close.

She turned back to Robin, and answered in an even tone, "No." She stepped backward, and let the door slide shut.

Sighing, he turned and headed back to the common room. There was nothing left to talk to her about. After all, he'd gotten her real answer. She hadn't met his eyes.


End file.
